I am going to try not to cry while I post this...but it will be hard.
It looks like I might not be teaching the St. James Winter Guard this year....or at all after that.
First thing is, they might not have one because the school will not support them financially at all so the girls are going to have to do fundraisers for everything. The school won't even allow them to use the buses for competitions without the girls paying for it. Breaks my heart for them.
Second reason, apparently there is a English teacher there that has color guard "experience" and they would like someone who works there to do the guard. They have no idea of her ability, but she wants it...and part of me really thinks they will just give it to her.
I just don't know if I will be able to handle something else that I love being stripped away from me. That thing, that when everything else is going bad can cheer me up...that thing that drives me through the day...will be gone.
I will be a skeleton...and empty shell. Everything I love will now be gone.
Am I strong enough......I'm not sure.
*Edit*
It is official...I just got the email. I will not be designing the STJWG show or working with the girls. Just need to try to get through this day......
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When the things of this world are what make us happy, we will often be let down. When we put so much of ourselves into activities, jobs, people, etc and forget the One who gave us all that we have, we will always feel empty. There is so much more to life...it's just too short to be consumed with this sort of thing.
ReplyDeleteThat being said, I know God has given you these talents and I know you love it. It just seems to me that perhaps He's telling you it's time to move on from the STJ guard. Do you really want to be a part of something that has NO SUPPORT from the school district? I am sad for the girls, but it's just so so so much work to do with zero support.
I agree with letting someone in the district do it. Sorry. You know I love and support you, but I believe the district should have teachers doing these things. I feel the same way about athletics. I believe a coach should be a teacher.
I'm sorry this is hard. I pray that you will seek His face and realize that people will often let you down. But His grace is sufficient, and He will always provide the joy you need...in ways that the world can't possibly provide.